Another Page Turned

What can I say, I am back home. Funny how fast time really goes. I still remember first learning that Calvin had associations with a study abroad program in Jerusalem during my Freshman year. I knew right then and there that I wanted to go. So these past 4 months were a long time in coming, and they were totally worth the patience. The time spent in and around Israel are definitely going to be one of those times in my life that I go back to when I speak of those "good ol' days" when I become that old guy that tells a bunch of stories all day not that I don't do that already. I don't plan on forgetting my experience during this life. I know in time all the understanding I have been given both in and out of classes will come. I don't need to formulate an explanation giving light the reason studying in Israel was beneficial for me and my faith, because I am the explanation. At the beginning of my semester I asked myself and God, "To what end is all my studying for?" The answers would not make sense in this medium, and actually that's quite liberating for me and you.

The reactions I get to my return and stories are mixed and I think most are amused by the novelty of the region I called home for a semester. Saying I've recently been to Israel isn't much of a conversation starter in Indiana. That's fine by me too, because I don't dominate dialogs well. I also need to clarify that whether or not I am or was ready for it time continues to march on. Even though I have only been back to the States for about a week now changes have taken place.

This is my last Jerusalem post. It will of course crop up in later posts, but it won't be my primary focus. I need to be in the present and at least relevant to myself. I am turning the page. One more passage to all of you.

Title: An Ode to All Those

To you who will never be in the history books and even to those who are and will be, may you never forget the one who strengthens you.
To you who weep, may you find solace in a friend.
To you who fight may you cease to hate.
To you who are indifferent to it all may you be moved to passionate living.
To you who gripe about the insignificant, may you construct a significant solution to share with all.
To you who wander the world, may you find peace every night.
To you who are too small, may you never let that stop you from achieving big dreams.
To you who already believe in Christ, may you open up to Him more and more everyday.
To you in authority, may you always remember your responsibility.

To you who suffers, may you never forget the one who suffered first.

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and May Your Next Page be Blessed more than the last!

In Him

To Home

I don't mean to rub this in everyone's face, but it'll probably come off that way (great way to preface a blog I know). I am done with official class work for this semester and now have 4.5 days all to myself! I think there is some built up resentment around campus for the luck that has fallen on me, but that's okay I do a good job of keeping peace with people. What I really want to say is now I get to decompress and enjoy the city for what it is. I get to write postcards, take pictures, and buy those souvenirs I keep passing by.

I'm at a weird place right now. It's 70 degrees or so outside and I am wearing shorts while listening to Christmas music....something is very bizarre here, but yet I feel almost at home. Paradox? I attribute this confusion to my Midwest weather mindset. There really is something to be said for the change of seasons. I enjoy the sun and will definitely miss it when I get off that plane in Chicago in two weeks, but a change of pace won't be dreaded. I really am ready mentally to come home, and am thankful for all the learning I have done here in Israel.

Before I cam here I was asked by a friend what it was that I really wanted to learn while being here. I answered that I wanted to grasp the living culture that is here today in Israel, and show that this place isn't just a bunch of old things that have expired in their utility (there was a little editing so this was not a direct quote from my conversation in August). I can say that I don't fully comprehend the present situation in Israel, but in the same breath I can claim to know it better than I did or would have had I not come. I have gotten to walk some of the geographic features that were present during the time of David. I can walk to the City of David (which is in fact outside the Old City's walls). I have walked the distance from Herod's palace to the supposed place of Gethsemane and it's surprisingly short and hilly.

I've seen things most only read about back home, but for what purpose? To take a picture of me in front of it? I've done that. Maybe to touch it and describe it? I plan on doing that too. How does my walking in a place like Petra change your or my understanding of history? Can it? I believe it can. In the States I would have read maybe one page of a textbook concering Petra (the inhabitants left no written record) and probably seen a few cool pictures, but nothing more. I could have seen it on a map and understood Petra's seclusion, but never fully. The place is carved out of a canyon! I use Petra as just an example of my wanderings, because it is currently the most difficult one for me to explain. If I had never walked there I would probably never would have been concerned about this culture, and its connections to the Bible. That's right this place is connected to individuals in the Bible, but you'll have to ask me about that personally. I know I have said this before, but I want you to be ready to drill me about everywhere I have been when I get back. I told you I am mentally ready to come home (I went over my notes), but are you ready for me (okay that was slightly narcissistic)? I want to use this knowledge to teach and preach and the best time to do that is now! I may not have a satisfactory answer to each question, but every question will be appreciated and continue learning both for you and me. I cannot wait!

See you soon!

He is

Ahhh I write this knowing that most of you back in the Sates have sat down or on your way to sitting down for an amazing meal hopefully shared with friends and/or family. I can say that for a fleeting moment I envy you. The smells, noise, and especially tastes of Thanksgiving are truly something to bring about the opportunity for joy to take over. For some of you your holiday clan has changed a bit. Maybe you married, engaged, moved, or lost a family member. To all of you I say blessings. To those of you not in the place you usually are for this holiday I say I sit with you. Sometimes we can only long for home and nothing more. To those of you who feel out of place I say blessings.

Blessings are simple. Blessings are companionship, fulfillment, time, mercy, grace, love, and on and on. Blessings are simple. Sometimes I forget my blessings and turn them into an entitlement. I act as though I deserve these blessings, because I am ME.

I work hard, I am entitled to fulfillment. I am a social being and thus am entitled to companionship. I sacrifice my time and therefore am entitled to more of it, as if I am some sort of alchemist. There are days where I catch myself in this type of self-entitlement mood. Then I am convicted.

I came into this world with nothing. Even my name is a blessing from my parents. Still even with my ME attitude blessings are given that I can not claim only receive. You see the difference about being entitled to something and being blessed to receive something is minute in definition, but has serious implications. Entitlement is to be seen as the absolute owner of that thing. Receiving a blessing is to be given something that you have no claim on and actually the one giving it to you is entitled to the whatever it is they are blessing you with. I have almost fully convinced myself that I have nothing entitled to me, but I cannot fully understand what that implicates. I can say I have been blessed beyond my own observation.

I am thankful for each and every one of my family members.

I am thankful for friends that have laughed, cried, walked, ran, hiked, grew-up, and sat in silence with.

I am thankful for the opportunity to be a student and each and every class I have sat in good or bad.

I am thankful for the struggles I have faced and the consequences of those.

I am thankful for the time I have been blessed with, and pray I have more, because I feel like I am just getting started.

Most of all I am thankful for the truth of it all that is Christ.

Happy Thanksgiving and may you be blessed by the all encompassing love of Christ!

We were Meant to be Stirred Regularly

A case for familiarity.

The past five days I have spent my time with my mom, and I loved it.

She kept telling me how I was so accustom to things here that I probably didn't notice them like she was. It's true I noticed the palm trees a lot more in August and September. The weather doesn't seem to change here either. I have become familiar with this place. I can usually find my way to places with just a map and a landmark (of course I have my moments.....mom can attest to that). I am used to seeing the transitions from the Muslim, Jewish, Chrisitian, and Armenian quarter in the Old City (some of you may not even know what I am talking about). I have a new familiar vocabulary using words like Sherut, Mosad, checkpoint, falaffle, Ultra-Orthodox, Messianic, Wye Agreement, and Shekel. I still have my touristy moments, but some of that magical aura that is tourist has worn off to give me a bit of a better focus on what Jerusalem is. I can say that like any big city Jerusalem has its issues. We just like to see this place as one of meaning as well we should.

I have to remind myself daily that this is the place where my Lord Jesus Christ was nailed to a cross, buried in a tomb, and rose from the dead for the payment of the sins of me and you. You would think that Jerusalem of all place would make this very easy to do. Early on I can say that I was reminded simply by the church bells of Dormition Abbey (right behind my school), but now that is familiar and I face this challenge unaided. What I really need is time to reflect on everything I have seen done, passed on the street, and heard. I want to articulate all of this, but the familiarity of it all almost makes it mundane. The paradox is what I am most familiar with, home, brings out all of these new connections and observations to the forefront of my mind. This was made apparent when my mom came to visit me for a short period.

Spending my time in a foreign country and having to build new relationships as I went through that transition more or less destroyed my sense of familiarity. I mean yes there were some foods, smells, and even interests that remained throughout this semester, but there is something to be said for continuing a conversation with someone you know so well. My mom can say simple sentences that to any eve dropper would ignore, but I understand and can reply in the same way. She can ask me simple questions that I had when I first came and I can usually answer them or know enough to say it requires more time than what I have had with it so far.

What I want to say is I realize that familiarity (spelled it right the first try!) is built up in my life so that I can become unfamiliar and then explain the difference. Familiarity should not translate to stagnation though.

Blessings!

Preparations

An apology is necessary for being silent for over two weeks now. I would like to thank you for your patience.

These past weeks have been very strange. I have gradually gotten busier but some of my classes are now over. If you can explain the logic in that please enlighten me, because I am at a loss. Anyways enough of that pity party.

What has really been on my mind is how in the world I am going to put what I have seen into words for those of you curious enough to ask me about it all. I don't want to overwhelm you to the point where your curiosity becomes regret nor do I want to speak in a way that does not inspire more curiosity. Does that illustrate my plight enough for you? An analogy I was given yesterday by a professor was "Vince, it is like trying to describe colors to a blind man." Ugh why does that have to sound so impossible! There is merit to this analogy though, because I can say from my experience the black ink of the scriptures become more alive when read in their place. This is not to say one cannot understand or meet part of our awesome God where ever you are. I would never say that God is limited to a place. Instead the connections to be made between verses become much more organic in this little region. Stories become relevant to the entire narrative. Stories like Sihon the King of Medaba and his refusal to let Moses and the Israelites pas through his territory begin to connect to other stories like Nahum and his coming to Elisha for healing of his leprosy. My fragmented understanding of the scriptures begins to become more holistic when these connections are made.

So here is my goal; to actually answer your questions in a relevant manner. There are so many questions you could have and I am not going to claim expertise in all things Holy Land, but I want to begin putting color to your understanding of the black and white scriptures. I want you to ask me about the current situation in Israel and the West Bank and in the next moment ask me about the Mount of Olives. I want to put my notes and maps to use so ask me to bust them out and explain myself. I'll even let you read my day to day account of my time here, but I cannot promise that is going to do much for you on its own.

I have another story to tell you. I met a man here at school who has probably built the reputation on campus as an oddball of sorts. He's one to ask the archaeology professor where the Ark of the Covenant is, but I still learned something from him. He has been to the land a handful of times now and comes to study here not simply for personal enrichment. He comes as a pilgrim. Instead of him passing through this place the place passes through him. Does that make sense (if not have me explain that one too). I can say I have learned to be more like a pilgrim and there is something to be said for that.

Some of you may discredit what I say as just an emotional reaction to my knowing I will soon be coming home. To you I say please don't judge what I have written until you have actually met me when I get back. If I have not changed then you can ignore what I have written. If I have changed in your eyes though maybe something really does happen to some one who comes here. It is not for everyone but I know this semester has been good for me. I have made lifelong connections and for that alone I am thankful. I pray your experiences are just as enriching.

Blessings!

The Peace of the Middle East

So often in the States I hear if there will ever be peace in the Middle East. I feel like that's a conceited question now. There are times of peace here just as there are times of conflict here. In my opinion the difference between this region and every other region is the reporting, lack of historical understanding, and the deep religious hearts in this region. When I say Middle East I am refering to the Arab region which includes Israel, Lebanon, Syria, Jordan, Saudi Arabia, Yemen, Oman, the Emirates, Kuwait, Iraq, and the West Bank. Turkey, Egypt, and Iran are also referred to here, because of their recent importance to the region but it should be understood that these two countries are different in their history, ethnicity, and relation to Islam.

Let's be honest about 6 out of 10 stories that come out of the Middle East are about conflict. Before coming to Israel I wanted to get an update on the country. I made the mistake of thinking that the mainstream news outlets would have anything about the day to day life in Jerusalem. No instead I am given a story on how a recent gathering became violent and the parallels between it and the most recent infantada. I even joked about how this would be the best place to die, because its the Holy Land and who knows maybe Christ would come back. Its scary how our misunderstanding of a situation affects the way in which we approach said situation. The other 40% of stories coming out of the Middle East nearly always mention conflict. We can't talk truly about the Middle East without mentioning conflict, but that does not mean peace does not exist here.

Historically this region has been the birth place of empires. Going as far back as the Akkadian Emperor Sargon from 2300 BC to the British Mandate that lasted until 1947 AD. There have been empires here from the beginning of written history. Now that's not to say that these empires were uninterrupted in the timeline. Like most things in history power takes time to transfer from one empire to another and in those in between times the little guys have a chance to catch their breath. Unfortunately for the Middle East it has almost always been the little guy in the the cross-hairs of the big empires. Some of you might be saying no look at the Ottoman Empire, and the earlier Islamic Empires from the Medieval Age. First off the Ottoman Empire originated out of Anatolia (Modern day Turkey) which could be placed in Europe. The earlier Islamic empires are significant, but in a broad look at history are more of an anomaly. It is rare for an empire to originate out of the Middle East. What makes this region such a target then you may be asking? It is the international crossroads of Asia, Africa, and Europe by land, and with the Suez Canal it has also become a critical lane for shipping all around the world. It would not be too far off to say that this region could be renamed the just "The Middle". We won't do that though. Also the three largest religions of the world originated out of this area. Judaism, Christianity, and Islam all claim historical roots of faith here in this region and that alone would bring it to the for front of most people's minds.

Religion brings personal conviction and emotion into the mix of confusion too. I am not bashing religion here, just simply pointing out that it adds another dynamic to the region that most other regions treat as secondary if at all. In the States there is the understanding of the separation of Church and State. This does not exist in the Middle East. So legislation, judiciary processes, nationalism, and all other things State is directly affected by the faith of the country. So how could we ever ask for true peace between Zionists (Jewish nationalists) and people of the West Bank? Both are so invested politically, socially, and religiously in this land that they defend their claims zealously. How could we ever overcome that passion with simple negotiations and peace treaties? Peace is not a business deal to be made, but rather a life to be changed and built up.

I can say that peace exists here in Israel. People can thrive here and grow, but its in the midst of fighter jets flying over their heads, M16s and AK-47s being a mainstay at every other street corner, and helicopters patrolling in anticipation of unrest. It is an incomplete peace, but not anymore incomplete than the peace you or I experience. Peace is the thriving of ALL God's good creation. So long as justice is cast aside, sexual impurity continues to grow in the form of the porn industry, greed flows through our markets, and above all pride gets in the way of humility and love there will be no peace. Its that simple. So there is peace here in the Middle East in the same way there is peace in United States, but both are an incomplete peace.

I doesn't hurt to pray for peace, and for the return of Christ soon to heal the wounds of his creation. We do a good job of beating each other up. My hope rests in one who can heal all wounds, because he's experienced all wounds.

Blessings and Peace

Training Ground

Just for your own knowledge I would not call the body of water known as the Sea of Galilee a sea. It's more like a very small lake. And the river Jordan is more like a creek. Now that I have that out of my system I can tell you why I want to go back.

In Isaiah 9:1 there is a phrase "Galilee of the Gentiles". Hey Isaiah, I thought this was Jewish land settled on by a handful of the tribes of Israel! After seeing the Galilee I see now that the history of this place is definitely a mix of Jew and Gentile cultures. Even in the Old Testament the Jews were not alone in claiming this area. Again for your own knowledge the region known as the Galilee is west of the "Sea" but does not historically stretch out to the coast. If you really must know where these borders are come see me when I get back in December and I'll show you this awesome map I've spent all semester with. Back to my main thought now. In the time of the Old Testament Egypt was still quite powerful, and before Joshua began his campaign throughout the land there was a Pharaoh known as Thutmose III. Like any good Pharaoh Thutmose had a superiority complex (some Pharaohs lacked this and were portrayed as feminine again another random detail I might elaborate on later). Thutmose was on a war path in Canaan and after capturing the coast he came to a crossroads. At the end of this crossroads sat Meggido, which was a key city to controlling the region now called the Galilee. There were three options to proceed from this crossroads for Thutmose and he chose the most direct, but also the narrowest. Tradition holds that Thutmose in all his glory was at the head of his army which was going single file through the Meggido pass. The Canaanites were guarding the other two valleys (which were more conducive to an advancing army) and were caught off guard when the Egyptians show up between them. The Canaanite lose Meggido after a 7 month siege (Thutmose's troops failed to take the city immediatly because there was plunder to be had right outside the walls). Meggido was like taking a thousand cities which is an exaggeration, but not by much. After this siege Thutmose moved a garrison in to Meggido and a few other key cities in the area. Already you can see the Galilee of the Gentiles being formed.

Its in the time of the New Testament thought that this idea of the Galilee of the Gentiles really takes off though. Here is a crash course on how it all played out from the time of Thutmose till the New Testament. Thutmose III places troops in key cities like Meggido and Beth-Shean. This is replaced with Hittite influence for a small period, and then the Assyrians show up (we talking about the time of Hezekiah now). Israel and then Judea go in to exile. The Jews return from Persia and soon the Greeks march under Alexander the Great's banner and come through the Galilee. After Alexander's death one of his prominent generals, Ptolemy takes control of the Galilee. Eventually Ptolemy's dynasty loses the Galilee and the rest of Israel to the Seleucid dynasty (another branch from Alexander's empire). Eventually the Jews unite and throw th Seleucids out and there the Hasmonean kingdom stands. Through a series of political intrigues involving Rome and Anipater (Herod the Great's father) the Hasmoneans lose their standing and Herod the Great takes the kingdom as his own with Roman backing. Herod founds new cities throughout the land of Israel and these have names like Caeserea in honor of his patrons. The cities also have a distinctly Grecco-Roman feel to them. Things like theaters, amphitheaters, Roman style villas, and temple to foreign gods begin to show up. Let's just say these were not kosher cities and they made a point not to be.

In the time of Jesus these Roman style cities had become mainstays in the current history and politic of the region of Galilee. Jesus himself grew up outside of one of these cities, but Nazereth was close enough for him to know what they were all about. Around the Sea of Galilee there were three prominent Roman style cities; Tiberius on the western shore, Bet-Seida to the north, and Hippus on the eastern shore. This is important to know if you are studying the Gospels, because the Sea of Galilee was one of the training grounds for the Disciples. These cities would have given the Disciples valuable experience in dealing with Gentiles especially Gentiles that are proud to be Gentiles. Somehow the Jews and Gentiles around this region lived together and the day to day interactions must have been really interesting. It is in this mixing of culture that Jesus begins his ministry and uses Cappernaum (another city of the Sea of Galilee) as a base of sorts. There is now mention of Jesus entering any Roman style city, but there is no need for it because we know that his name and actions would have been known in these places as well. The important thing to remember is that the Disciples were getting a taste of what evangelism would have to be in order to interact with people beyond this small body of water. Eventually most would find themselves around the Mediterranean interacting with other Gentiles and other Jews who lived beyond Israel. Their time around the Galilee of the Gentiles would prove invaluable in their living in faith wherever they were. Conservative fishermen became international evangelists. Just another miracle Jesus performed that is so quickly forgotten.

300, 4000, and More

Μὲν ὁ Λεονίδας μετὰ τῆς στρατια αὐτοῦ ἀπέθανον ὑπο Ξέρξου δὲ εὗρον ἔτι νίκην.

"On the one hand Leonidas and his army were put to death by Xerxes but on the other hand they still found victory."

I am sure most of us have heard of the story of the 300 Spartans (plus a few other city-states) and the battle of Thermopylae. I can thank Hollywood for making the exaggerated motion picture that probably enlightened most of you to this story. I'm not going to go into the details of the three day battle that took place. You can read Herodotus's Histories for that if you really want the details. I want to talk about selfless victories.

It should be said that Leonidas and his army were not entirely selfless in their battle against the Persians, but their victory was felt most directly by city- states others than their own. Athens was the biggest benefactor in the battle of Thermopyale and if I remember correctly Athens sent no men there. In the end the Greeks at Thermopylae either retreated or were killed, but their victory was not one of conquest. Instead their victory was that of a speed-bump that slowed the Persian advance (for another analogy think of using a pawn in chess to prevent a checkmate). History remembers this battle, because of what followed it and that was Greek victories for centuries to come. So where am I going with this you may ask.

Being a Christian I am called to selflessness. Now I am not going to go looking for a Persian army to defeat at a narrow pass. No, my selflessness looks different. This past week at church the message focused on Matthew 15:29-39. The pastor specifically looked at the disciples in this passage (in my experience doing this reminds me of the disciples and my own humanity). Jesus does not want to send the crowd away hungry so after all the miracles he has performed he asks the disciples what they have. Their lunch is sadly inadequate for even themselves (7 loaves of bread and 2 small fish would not go far among twelve of my friends). They give it to Jesus anyway maybe hoping that he'll go and ask for more from the crowd and distribute it equally. Instead Jesus blesses just their portion and tells the disciples to distribute it. At this point I'd be convinced that this was a lesson in asceticism and there would be no lunch for me. Oh but how quickly I'd doubt, because not only is everyone sent away satisfied, but there are leftovers! This is probably the only meal in history where the leftovers supersede the initial meal size.

You see Jesus calls for selflessness not because he wants us to learn to go without, but because through our selflessness He can fully utilize us, inadequacies and all. Sure I won't stand I probably won't stand in front of a Persian army prepared to die for people I have never met, but I don't have to have that kind of story. I don't have to be the best to be used by God sufficiently. I just have to learn to let go of the little that I claim to have and give it to Him.

Blessings!

Eye Opening

I am finally doing this right by listening to Jon Foreman while I am typing. Just so you all know he may be the best musician to just chill to. Now on to the main act!

I spent my weekend in the South of Israel not France, but here's an aside when Herod the Great's sons failed to serve Rome as well as their father they were sent to Gaul which included most of present day France. The first day we ended at Ashkelon which is on the coast of the Mediterranean and from there we watched the sunset. It was so cool to see the sun disappear on the horizon among the crusader ruins and recent excavations. In Ashkelon there is an ancient arched gate that has been partially reconstructed, and before the discovery of another arched gate in Dan (Northern Israeli town) this gate was the oldest known arched structure.

On our second day we went to both Beer-Sheba and Arad. Beer Sheba is found in Abraham and Isaac's journeys. It is here at Beer-Sheba that both patriarchs made a treaty with the king of Gerar (west of Beer-Sheba). Beer-Sheba can be translated in to "well of the oath" which is fitting when you consider what happened here so long ago. Beer-Sheba and Arad are significant in that at both there was a horned altar found on site. Now this would not have been a big deal if these altars were not contemporaries to the construction of the temple in Jerusalem. It is possible that these altars indicate some sort of unorthodox Jewish cult. The altar in Beer-Sheba was found in pieces that were later used to build other structures, we know that these pieces were used for altar because of the preciseness of their cut. At Arad we not only have a torn up altar but the foundations of a temple structure. Within this temple there were two standing stones inside its holy of holies. These two standing stones most likely represented two deities. Both Arad and Beer-Sheba would have faced the reforms of Hezekiah if these theories of unorthodox cults is true. I tell you this story not to tarnish the Jewish tradition, but to illustrate that even then people would interpret and stray just as easily as we do today. For a biblical reference go to Amos 5 which was written a decade or so before Hezekiah's reforms. We ended our second day at the "Superbowl" which is the biggest erosion crater on the planet. It was quite the view and we even saw a herd of Ibex (not sure if herd is the correct word for this species).

Our third and final day began at Masada. It is really out in the middle of the wilderness and only offers near absolute security. There is only about an inch of rain that falls in the area and most of the garrison's responsibility would have been collecting water for the million gallon cistern (no exageration that cistern was huge!). In my mind Masada was built for the idea of having a vault for a fortress and it really did not serve any practical purpose. I was probably one of the most expensive constructions Herod approved of, because of its scale and remoteness. Most know Masada, because of the Josephus account of all the Jews being besieged there by the Romans. Josephus tells the story of all the Jewish martyrs who killed their families and themselves before the Romans could capture them. All I will say is Josephus was not there and the evidence points to a different scenario. It was an experience just hiking up to the fortress and looking down (there are still remains of the Roman camps, earthen ramp, and siege enclosure wall which made me geek out a bit). Masada was an awesome sight, but the stories surrounding it are tragic.

Having read about most of this history before I came to the land, I am finding that I enjoy the sites and what they have to offer, but they are not my top experiences.

Yesterday I went to the Coptic school for another round of PE classes with the 8th and 5th graders. I brought an American Football with me this time, and while some looked at it with disdain they all enjoyed it in their own rite I think. Some wanted to make it a dodge ball, others a kickball, and a few actually wanted to learn to throw it correctly. It was such a blast to actually contribute to their knowledge (even though American Football is not exactly a priority for anyone). There is so much I can say about the school, but to do it justice I am going to wait to reflect fully on it and then you will get pictures. For now enjoy the pictures of the sites I upload, random stories I tell, and never forget your own stories. You don't have to be in a foreign country to contribute to your own and others' stories.

Blessings!

Reoccurring Thoughts

I used to find myself writing about lots of topics and formulating opinions and arguments. If you read my journal from then you'd come across everything from politics to philosophy stopping at thoughts on boredom and grace in between. I have gradually focused myself though, and for the sake of not repeating myself over and over again I have kept most of this writing to myself till now.

You see I am sharing finally, because I have learned that I am not given these thoughts simply for myself. Sometimes I have experienced God's guidance through the thoughts and words of other people who may or may not have known that He was using them. I am not saying all of this will click with everyone and it doesn't have to. I just want to share ok?

Lately (read "the past five months") I have found myself writing more prayers in my journal than my typical topic driven articles. Some asking for my pride to be shattered over and over. Others I am simply thanking God for His faithfulness. In most I am asking for guidance hoping for affirmation in my current path. In my latest written prayer I came to realize how much shaping God has done in and around my life.

He has brought amazing friends into my life whom I consider family these past few years. Through them I have learned so much about forgiveness, honesty, accountability, loyalty, and true fellowship. I have overcome difficulties with these people and they probably know me better than I know myself in some ways. I pray that God brings you all in to a community like the one I have been blessed to be a part of.

He has shaped me more into the man that I desire to be. I am gradually becoming more confident in my abilities. I speak up now rather than letting a moment slip by. Years ago I'd be silent in situations that I now find passion in. I am breaking down compartments in my life. Living as a whole is much simpler than trying to be three things in one day. I have been taught to listen and understand first (I still need work on this one) before I react. I have learned to take up challenges and go with them (Professor Noe those Greek sentences are coming). Most especially God has taught me to make my faith, my faith. I am not the most read individual and actually have not read all of the Bible yet either, but I dig into the Gospels. I especially like setting up the historical context of the Bible up for someone. One thing I am still trying to grapple with though is what really motivates me to do certain things.

Currently I am reading three books not immediately related to any class I am taking here in Jerusalem. Catch -22 is my fiction fix. I read this for an escape, because I know its better for me (especially my bad eyes) than a movie, and it's more fun to read in a garden than watch a movie inside. I am reading The Land Called Holy by Robert Louis Wilken because it was recommended to me by a professor and I like reading recommended books (I keep an unofficial list of all that are said my classes). It's thick and difficult to get into initially but the benefits to my understanding is worth the effort. Then there is the odd ball. I am reading a book titled Towers of Stone: The Battle of Wills in Chechnya by a polish journalist. When reading this work I feel like I am making an escape into another world than I am sorely reminded this is non-fiction. I've read enough Tom Clancy and Vince Flynn to know political intrigue can effect military action on the black op level. In Chechnya it effects every level. It resulted in the complete destruction of the largest city in Chechnya, Gronzy. I have asked myself why do I keep reading this? I can guess where this is going, because it's non-fiction and the ending does not have to be happy. I've given up hoping this book ends happily, because it was written a few years ago and as far as I know the area is still recovering from the two wars. Also in fiction there is usually a clear good and bad team to root for. In Chechnya not so much. I don't know why I am reading this. It can't simply be for entertainment that'd be sadistic. It can't be for personal gain, because if I wanted just personal gain I would stop reading and go for a run. Maybe there'll be a breakthrough in my understanding later if not that's ok.

I want to conclude with a prayer.

Lord,

Thank you for the silence. Thank you for the intention behind it and reminding me to be still and know that you are Lord. Train me to be quiet before you and listen. Give me confidence to speak boldly of you. Continue to protect and mold all of us Lord. Do not forget your quiet servants. Thank you for your sacrifice. May we all find you in the silence.

Amen

Blessings!

Tuesday Mornings

I have found at least one thing I can talk about weekly and that is my Tuesday mornings at the Coptic School on St. George street.

Today I only had one period to teach because there was a school wide exam time slated for the period I would have had next. Just like you find in any school there were kids cramming for their Arabic class during the supposed PE time. So my already small class of 8th grade boys (usually 11) was down to four who were tired of their handbooks and wanted a little football in their day. In hindsight it is probably a good thing I did not attempt to teach them Frisbee today, because they were just looking for some time to relax and have fun. I can say I had fun. One thing I am learning here is flexibility. Not only physically when playing soccer in a cramped courtyard, but also with plans and time. No one told me that there would be only one period for me and I spent about half an hour just hanging around before I figured that one out. Luckily I ran in to my friend from last week during the break between classes. You see I come in to help with two periods and in between these periods is a 15 to 20 minute break built in for everybody's sanity. During this time most of the kids buy snacks and hangout in the courtyard. Today I spent my time out there rather than in the principal's office (good move I think). After the break all the kids go running upstairs to get to class, leaving behind wrappers and Coke cans (I was like this for a while too and still have to catch myself at times). It should be known that this is a small, low budget school and most of the people working there have more responsibility than their American counterparts at least in regard to daily duties. Still in ignorance to the fact that I only would have one period, I decided to pitch in and clean the courtyard up a bit. It's surprising how picking up just some colorful wrappers can really change the appearance of a place. Garbage is a funny thing.

Think about this, my professor said that archaeologists are prone to label ornate things as part of a cult. So with this idea of garbage being a funny thing what do you think future archaeologists will say about all the uncovered Barbies, diapers, Coke cans, People Magazines, "Green" Starbucks cups, and the list could go on on? Now I know that in all likely hood cultural mainstays will probably still be around (some I wish won't) and if not these hypothetical archaeologists will at least be able to quickly figure out what this find is. Which leads me to my final point. What do we want to be remembered for? What do I want my life to be synonymous with?

When these hypothetical archaeologists dig up my place of former residence I hope they find my journals. Its likely those will not survive the elements though. So maybe they'll find this computer and the hard drive still in tact. From there I hope they can read English. They'd find my papers, pictures, music, and my low win percentage on solitaire (I get impatient sometimes ok). I don't know what else could survive the elements. My guitar may survive, but they'd only have the music from my computer to guess at what it was that I might have played. You see it is hard to leave behind just material goods and expect a message to get across. Our best bet of getting a message to go from our generation to the next is by living our message and hoping the idea sinks in. A real message requires people really living out that message.

More than expected

It's been too long hasn't it. I apologize for the gap in correspondence. I have a story you all may like though.

Have you ever felt slightly out of place in a good way and all you can do smile and laugh at the strange situation you have found yourself in? I felt that way this morning. You see I am a volunteer at a school in the Old City, and I signed on to help with the PE program fr 8th and 5th grade boys. Here is my morning.

Up at 7 am for a shower, breakfast, and a glance at the notes I took for the test I have at 8:30. Test concluded with 40 minutes till I need to show up at the front door of the school to teach the 3rd and 4th periods. It took me 8 minutes to go from my campus on Mt. Zion to the school on King George street in the Christian Quarter. I ring the doorbell and the real adventure begins.

All the kids are wearing blue polos with long pants (I am wearing a green t-shirt with khaki cargo shorts). Quickly I climb the stairs to what I believe is the third floor to speak to the Coptic Sister who runs the school, and she takes me across the hall to the principal's office. I've never been to the principal's office even in the States so I'm a fish way out of water (that was a poor attempt at a joke). So I find myself 15 minutes early waiting in the principal's office with the principal and another teacher and both are talking Arabic. I sit awkwardly hoping not to draw too much attention to myself; I just want to meet the kids, still believing this awkwardness will pass once I can hold a position. 5 minutes pass and I still have 10 till the 3rd period starts (my first class). The principal turns to his computer and I make eye contact with the teacher sitting across from me. He asks me where I am from. I answer the United States and then he asks which one. I say Indiana, but he hears India to my relief there was a globe nearby I could identify my place of origin and I realized for a split second how far from home I really am. The only other time I have heard Indiana and India being mixed up was in a movie and here I am living it. After I clarified that he told me about himself. He was from Egypt and has a family back there. He also told me was the teacher I would be working with and that the 8th grade boys would likely punish me. I wasn't sure if he just couldn't find the right word and just settled on punish me or if he was being blunt. The bell rings and my naiveté only has seconds left.

I introduce myself to eight 8th graders who of course introduce themselves all at the same time. Some had great English and others not so much. I am horrible with names even when I can tell what is being said, and I really tried to remember them, but I do remember faces. I thought I'd show them some stretches like I had to do in PE, but they were so eager to play I only got through 3 stretches before the ball went flying. One of the boys doesn't want to play football (soccer) so I am placed on a team. Before the game starts the teacher recommends that I watch myself (meaning what?). We start playing in the school's pave courtyard which created a indoor/outdoor hybrid field with paving stones beneath us. Now I have never played on a soccer team and it showed horribly playing these guys. We didn't really keep score but would argue goals after each shot. We finally set up flower pots as goal posts(I am still amazed those survived). I took a few good shots made a few and blocked a few (we won't mention I was the only one to score on my own team......). I couldn't help but laugh whenever they came to me arguing a goal of hand ball. How did I become the the designated ref too? The hour passed quickly only to put me back in the principal's office to wait for the break time to end and classes to resume.

I introduced myself to another teacher who was also from Egypt (Coptic school by the way). He told me I was going to be working with the 5th grade boys. There are only two students in this class. One disappears back up stairs 10 minutes into our PE session. The other is the only one whose name I remember. His name is Sarri (sounds like sorry) and when I said "Sorry could you repeat that?" You can only imagine some of the confusion, but we got it. Sarri told me his favorite subjects were math and English. He spoke so clearly. Sarri, is teacher, and I played "volleyball." It was us versus Sarri. It was fun to just mess around for a bit. With ten minute left it was just me and Sarri. We talked about other sports like baseball, American Football, and Frisbee. He also told me a bit about himself and I actually just listened mostly. He likes to play the drums and said he would play the Saxophone if he had one. I made at least one friend.

On my way out I ran into the Coptic Sister who runs the school on her way back to the the school. She asked me who it was I was talking to, and I explained a bit. Turns out my new friend is usually the shy one and hides his good English quiet well. So maybe I wasn't as awkward as I thought I might be. Maybe when you give you receive too?

I know this isn't like what I've usually blogged about but this is by far my favorite story so far.

Life is better than I deserve.

Blessings!

Speak Slowly and Understand Deeply

As some things get older their utility changes. No I am not talking about people here I am talking about non-living materials. Let me give you an example. This past weekend I went to Gezer with my classmates here in Jerusalem. The Tell at Gezer is full of old materials strewn through out the area. This place was once a thriving city and is now a hiking path with some old vestiges of what once was. One of these vestiges is a small grouping of standing rectangular stones reminding of an incomplete stone hedge. Historically we have no idea why these stones are where they are or to what purpose they served. Some suggest a religious monument of sorts while others think town square material, but the idea is these stones had a purpose because they did not just place themselves there sometime in the past. Today we leave them as they are because of the mystery they portray to all historians and archaeologists. The beauty of the past is that we have a rough idea of what it may have been like but there are details of past cultures that we just can't grasp because of the change that hundreds of years amounts to. It also must be said that 99.9% of ancient writings were written for and sometimes by the elite or ruling people. So even if the elite say something about these standing stones of ours we can only say that this is how the elite viewed them.

So let's say we find a written record from the governor of Gezer that says these stones are memorials to a great battle fought on the plains of Gezer. We have the official label but we still lack the day to day utility of the stones. Maybe the people of Gezer would use the stones to remind themselves of their young men who fell in that battle like the way the Vietnam Memorial reminds our American culture of that war. Maybe this was a place of celebration because of the great victory achieved by the men of Gezer's arms and it was a way in which the memorialized their comrades similar to the Leonidas statute raised by the Athenians celebrating Spartan military prowess that gave them time to abandon Athens. So yes these stones could be a memorial or shrine of sorts and that would make lots of sense given the fact that nearly every culture has memorialized something or has designated a physical place of worship, but today we use it for something else. We use it to challenge ourselves to understand ancient and foreign culture more deeply and as a jungle gym. I was attempting to get a picture of just the stones but my some of my classmates saw an opportunity to climb and honestly I would not be surprised if the youth of Gezer also climbed on these stones like my classmates.

A lot can be said historically, but do not let anyone tell you that they know every detail because even in the present we miss little details in our writing of history.

A silent affair

Today September 19 is Yom Kippur. Yom Kippur is the Jewish day of atonement and the ten days before today was spent addressing and confessing sins from the past year. Someone in my group said it reminded them of how when you were little you extra good near the end of November and December so that Santa would add a little something extra for you. Now I know that the Jews take this time much more seriously then a five year-old who wanted the latest Batman figure, but the idea of finding favor in the eyes of the one who judges stands either way. The day of Yom Kippur is the big show in Judaism but what's so great about it is that it is a show of silence. Think about that for a bit. Christmas and Easter are full of movement and it all very good, but for the Jews their largest celebration is a day of self denial.

All of the Jews (Ultra-Orthodox to Secular) in Jerusalem fast which also means no water. They all go without cars, buses, businesses, and post offices. So maybe my list does not impress but it is an eerie feeling when an entire city falls quiet. When an entire quarter in the Old City only goes to synagogue you notice that. I could count 21 cars moving about in an hour on one of the busiest roads in the New City (5 of these were emergency personnel vehicles of which 3 had lights going but no horns). That means for the hour or so I spent in the city I saw one car every 3 minutes or so. In no other city will you ever experience this. The practice dates way back too. In Leviticus 16 you read God's handing down of the requirements for this day. Then you can go and read the whole book of Hebrews (It's actually a quite easy to read it all in one sitting) and see how this relates to Christianity.

For your enjoyment I am including a video I took to try and capture the atmosphere of the city. Again remember this is one of the busiest roads (4 lanes, 2 way) and I walked down the middle of it for about 7 minutes without seeing or hearing a car!

It's not a Fantasy Book

We went on another field study on Saturday which was titled Jerusalem Approaches. The basic idea behind this study was to understand the different routes with which one could leave or enter the city of Jerusalem. These routes are still relevant today, but were even more vital in the ancient world. First I need to clarify my vocabulary. When I say the City of David I am talking about the City of Jerusalem when David reigned, it is located on the Eastern hill just across the Kidron valley from the Mount of Olives. So we have (from east to west) the Mount of Olives as the eastern buffer, the Kidron valley, Eastern Hill (the most settled portion of city in ancient times), just North of the Eastern Hill is the Temple Mount (Mt. Moriah before the temple was built), and for now that is all that is needed.

So David takes Jerusalem from the Jebusites and purchases its threshing floor (first picture is a threshing floor in Bethlehem). His palace sits on the Northern end of the Eastern Hill (so closest to Mt. Moriah you can be on the hill). To the East sits the Mount of Olives which serves as a natural barrier from invaders in the East, but still must be controlled by the Israelites, because from the Mount of Olives anyone gets a commanding view of the entire city. Pompey the Great (a Roman General and contemporary of Julius Caesar) actually set up his headquarters on this hill when he cam to take Jerusalem under the Roman yoke. Now imagine Solomon building the first temple. He builds it on Mt. Moriah which is just North of the Eastern Hill. Logistically it is easiest to approach Jerusalem from the North. The South is more of a back door that involves crossing through the Judean wilderness. The East is guarded by the Mount of Olives and other obstacles, and the West is nearly impossible to cross with an army. From the North one gets to come DOWN right into the city. So think about this Solomon builds the temple on the furthest reaches of the city at the time...... Not a fortress, but the temple of God sits as the first thing any traveler coming from the most frequented route to ancient Jerusalem would see. Now I want you to read Psalms 48 (yeah do it you will appreciate all of this after you read this passage).

This is just a small taste of what it is I am learning here, and the stories continue to come alive. Standing on the Southern Stairs of the temple complex and knowing that Jesus probably preached here when he refers to white-washed (let alone seeing those tombs) is amazing. On this same spot it is argued that Peter preached on the day of Pentecost and in these baths the new believers were baptized. The ripples of Christianity started here in this city and then the surrounding countryside and on and on to where it is now.

Where are You?

Who would have thought getting involved in a Church in the "Holy Land" (I do quotes because I believe God made all Land Holy through Christ but that's another story for later) would be so hard while I am studying here. I know we are the Church when 2 or more of us gather but there is something about the intentionality of a service that allows faith to become action even if it a repetitive action. I bring all of this up because last night I went to the western wall (wailing wall) to observe the Jews worship to bring in the new year (Happy Rosh Shoshana!).

While I was doing this I felt really out of place, and unlike most people who visit did not feel the need to go tough the wall. I think I have created this barrier in my mind in order to create respect for both the Jews and Muslims here in the city. I appreciate the history of this city, but sometimes it feels empty. For all the talk and hype that went in to me going to this city I almost feel like I am robbing myself whenever I do homework over bombing around Jerusalem and here I am now writing a blog instead of seeing the city. I find though that my writing and reading allow me to be fed and act on my faith. I write these knowing that those of you who are reading care about me and I love you. I do my Greek homework because I love finding the different ways in which an aorist active verb written by Mark indicates a historical present tense (I am a Greek geek). Some of my best experiences here so far have been reading scripture (English and Greek) on sight and worshiping either on campus or in the two churches I have made it to. I also find that no matter where I am at I just want to find good meaningful conversation. I am no tired of where I am at, please don't think that's my point here. Rather I want you to understand as I do now that you don't go to a place to find God. He leads you always. Take the time to see where you are at and you will find Him. I found Him in worship tonight.

God's temple is not a place. It is you and me and the whole Church body. Don't let anyone tell you differently.

To a New Land

Exodus 3:8 "...land flowing with milk and honey." Sounds amazing doesn't it? Actually in my former understanding I did not understand why the Israelite had such a hard time going to this land which flows with milk and honey. I mean if the land flows with these than wouldn't you just dive in? I know I would, but having experienced some of this land and learned more about it I realize that their was a difficulty coming to Israel. The Israelites were in fact coming out of Egypt. Numbers 14:3 "...'Wouldn't it be better for us [Israelites] to go back to Egypt?'" Egypt was full of food, security, and other comforts one would find in the ancient world. Egypt was one of the superpowers and to be a slave in Egypt had more benefits than living out in desert on your own in the area of present day Israel, Syria, Lebanon, and Jordan (I will from here on out refer to as Israel).

Egypt had the Nile river. This alone puts Egypt on top of the surrounding areas. A consistent harvest calendar allows for civilization to become more complicated (some would say sophisticated). It also allows for a more centralized government because of the communication the river transportation allows. Lastly Egypt is very secure in the ancient world because it is surrounded by barren desert. Egypt doesn't need to rely on anything beyond the river really.

In the land of Israel there is no powerful river (the Jordan does not compare). There are numerous highways in and out of Israel that make it very vulnerable to attack while also making it a prime target. So the Israelites have to rely on rain for crops to grow not an annual flooding of a river like Egypt. On top of that Israel does not make Egypt a target for military exercises (that's a modern history phenomenon) Israel was a target of Egypt as well as the target of a few other big names of the day. The land of Israel is not conducive to building an empire because it lacks too much.

So why the struggle you ask? Because faith is what is needed to live in the Promise Land. Some of the Israelites did not want to leave the easy plains of Egypt for the high hills and dry land of Israel. The milk and honey did not come flowing because of the Nile. It all came from the Hand of God.

Sorry don't mean to be rude.

So I have become much more comfortable with the Old City. I can navigate the area ok and I can usually gather my bearings. I know how to duck and dodge the mobs of people coming down the narrow streets going the other way. I feel like I am in a compressed hall way, my days at Penn High School seem to have trained me well for this place. There is just one hiccup in what would be as close to a perfect experience. I am human and so is everyone else in this city.

What I am saying is I feel rude here sometimes and I don't like it. Today in the Old City a shopkeeper came out and was quite inviting but my group was ahead of me and wasn't stopping there so I attempted to make the conversation pleasantly short. Maybe I would have been better off acting deaf but I couldn't help it we already started speaking before I got a chance to process what was happening. Eventually I did one of those awkward talk walk away things while trying to be polite (this never really works for anyone). The crazy thing is there are so many different shopkeepers, some are quite until you get into their shop, my personal favorite, some try to get you to stop on the street by lying to you (their favorite line is "Mr. you dropped something" I only checked once and learned my lesson then). Others will ask you where you are from (one today wasn't so nice he asked "What F_______ country are you A_______ [you can fill in the blanks as you see fit] from yeah that makes me want to stop and give you business.....O man this going to interesting). I just wanted some postcards honestly and get some going rates on potential gifts. I think I have found some places that aren't so hard to be polite to and I am glad for it but I just can't get over having to keep my head down when I walk down the street with a shopkeeper harassing me or the group I am in. There is a different type of life in this city and I am comfortable but not clicking with it all the time. same goes for anywhere you live though and I hope you can say the same for where you are at. Admit it home is great but there are some things about it you'd rather live without. Just be happy you don't have awkward shopkeepers vying for your business as soon as you walk down the road. More to come!

Thoughts on the Holy LAND

Dusk on the Old City walls is an experience. Yesterday I pulled myself away from studies long enough for some memorable experiences. A group of us went to Jerusalem's New City to get a feel for their coffee/tea selection. I decided to be adventurous (when in Israel!?) and ordered what I believe was called Shablah(probably spelled that incorrectly). It is an Egyptian drink or so the cafe menu said and consists of steamed or warm milk a hint a vanilla shaved cashews for a nutty taste and some other ingredients I failed to notice. I have to say other than it being a hot drink in 80 to 90 degree weather it was really good.

After dinner we went for a walk along the Old City walls. It was a really cool way to see the city both New and Old. There are scars of the '67 war still up there and really makes this wall a living part of history. I took a picture of Zion Gate (right next to my school) and it is covered in bullet holes. These are a testimony to the violence and sacrifice different people have made for even just a small quarter of this city known as Jerusalem.

Ok food for thought for all of you. In the States we have lots of land which in turn creates lots of space and an attitude less inclined to tie ourselves as Americans to a specific spot in America (you may want to reread that). With that said it is entirely different here. I know the longer history here reinforces certain attitudes towards holy spots like the Temple Mount (a Jewish and Islamic holy sight), but get this there are SIX denominations that share the Church of the Holy Seplechre. Now granted they fight terribly at times and it got to the point where a Muslim family is in charge of the gate key (embarrassing I know). I am still amazed that the church is still standing let alone the city.

Sunday Service in the Old City

Last minute I made my decision on which Church to go to for my first service in Israel. I think this is when I make my best decisions because I don't over think it. I say that because I went to the closest church to the campus. I went to Christ Church which is just inside Jaffa gate.

Somewhere around 15 other students made the same decision I did and we all walked there together. I decided to wear long sleeves and long pants which wasn't my best decision of the day simply because it was already well over 80 before the service even began.

When we made it to the church we had to walk in through a small building that had a man there to point us in the right direction. I believe this is a security measure, because this building was quite small and we were in it for maybe a minute at most. Christ Church is an Anglican church and is the oldest protestant church in all of the Middle East. It was built by the British when they had a lot of influence in the area. Sorry I can't remember all of the exact history.

Back to my own experience though. I was the only student wearing long sleeves and only noticed that older men opted for similar dress as me. I wonder if that speaks to my in character haha. The sermon was in English and focused on Jeremiah 2:1-13. Nearly all of the songs were what I sing back home except a few were in Hebrew (not an easy language to sing in). Sunday was also a communion Sunday. It was amazing to have communion in the the same city Jesus had the Last Supper (we visited the the traditional room or building that some believe the Last Supper took place history tells us though that the actual building was probably lost the same time the temple was destroyed).

Church has become much more expansive for me and I remember thinking about the churches I have been to back in the States and though there is a time difference I thought of myself worshiping together with you while I was 2000 miles away.

Blessings!

First Day in the Old City

Ok I first need to clarify my whole notion of what the word "old" entails has changed a bit. In the States we say "oh that building is from the 50's so, yeah it's kinda old." Hahaha! JUC's (the school) building was built in the late 19th century for my American friends thats a little after our civil war. Think about that. With that said I think I can throughly blow your mind now.

Today I spent 2 hours in Jerusalem's OLD City. It was amazing. We saw the wailing wall, Dome of the Rock, and the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. These are old and take some reflection to fully grasp what it is that you are looking at. There are deep traditions tied to this city. Even things like calls to worship still stand out to me, because I just don't get them back in the States.

This place also has a storied history of conflict and that's not a hidden fact. Security is blatantly obvious and heavily armed. It's normal to see assault rifles being toted around by the IDF or to see fully equipped policemen just around the corner. If they say you can't pass you just don't ask questions and work around it. that's the way it works.

I am excited to experience more of this place.

Blessings!

In Transition

Three months ago I started work for a library as a cataloger. Sounds boring doesn't it? Well it had it's moments, but the librarian I shared an office with was great and working with books that were sometimes older than this country made it interesting. I find it amazing how quickly time really does fly by after it has passed. Maybe I just have a poor memory or maybe the days were so similar the significant times are all that really stand out. Yesterday was my last day at this job and well I was looking forward to the end, but that doesn't mean I didn't like the job. One thing I remember doing nearly everyday was ask my supervisor questions about cataloging. I didn't know what details to pay attention to and which stray marks to leave alone especially when the books was older than the current English language. Yesterday she thanked me for my attention to detail. I always thought she thought I was clueless. Just goes to show one is better off admitting their ignorance than trying to ignore it.

In a week I'll have a lot of ignorance to admit. I am leaving the States for Israel and though I have read a lot and heard a lot I know I'll still be pretty clueless. That's ok with me. I will not only learn more about the culture but also more about myself. I am a work in progress (still a student) and will continue to be one until I die. I think I'll always have some ignorance to admit and that makes me wonder if in this life I really am always in a state of transition. I think I am.

Time

So I was in Theology class today and we stared talking about the idea of time and the Triune God's relationship to such a dimension. Karl Barth had an interesting quote concerning this. It goes something like God experiences the beginning middle and end simultaneously. Confusing right? Well maybe not so much after you give it some thought. You see in my understanding of time most of the time I see an occurrence as a point on a line. At most this understanding is two dimensional at best. The point has a beginning and end. End of story right? No because time has depth too. Instead of saying that a given occurrence happened at a point in time it may be best to understand it as happening in a sphere of time. With a sphere you add the "now" that is experienced. You give the beginning and end definition because without a "now" there is no end nor beginning. From what I've read some cultures understand time as a more circular construct rather than a line. So maybe what I want you to leave with here would be a rethinking of what the dimensions of time look like for you. Along with that I hope you come back, because I think I'll be hashing this out some more.

Short Reflections 1

Today was my first day back at school after Spring Break. I already miss the woods. I sit here listening to digital devices making their little quirks and buzzes. I remember the stillness of the woods. We are such a noisy species. That's not to say that noise is bad or I cannot handle it, but rather to point out that silence is well.............. awkward. I label myself as a pretty quiet person, and having no current roommate makes that normal for me. I'm learning to thrive in silence, but the woods really taught me about silence. When the only thing you can hear is your breath and the pats your feet make as you cross the pine needles makes you wonder if a falling tree really makes any sound at all. I guess I can say that I am learning that there are two distinct categories of noise. The first is unnecessary or distracting noise. The second is the direct result of praise. My question now is if I create an analogy of noise and silence to light and shadow; is noise the lack of silence (shadow to light) or is silence the lack of noise? hmmmmmm............ I'll let you know what conclusion I come to. Until then it is time to call it a night.

Changing Dreams

A dream changed today. Time has a tendency to do that. I have learned to let go of dreams. This is not to say that I do not have hope in anything, but instead I have learned that what I would like and what I am called to do aren't always the same thing. I have been called to love God and neighbor. Sometimes that means putting my own dreams aside, and to pick up the work gloves. Don't let me kid you into thinking I enjoy this all the time. Only by the grace of God can I say that I am saved everyday from myself. What does this have to do with anything you may ask. I think it shows what it means to lay down one's life for friend or foe. You see I don't know the future, but I can tell you that all of my dreams aren't the future I have in front of me. That's ok. Dreams change and so do I. I hope that God will teach me to dream for what he desires in my life. Until then I will do what he has laid upon me, and through that know him more. It is time to let go and open my eye wider.

A Change

So last year I had decided that I wasn't going to play any violent video games because of what I felt they promoted. Since this summer I have given up that pursuit, but I believe it is time to reclaim that hill in my life. This isn't to say I am addicted to video games and need to stop. Instead I aim to put my belief into a tangible action. Maybe I am targeting the wrong thing, but I won't know how far off I might miss if I never have the courage to take a shot myself. So here is my plan: from now until June I will not play XBOX. It is time to try something new.